Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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