No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
