this beer tastes like vomit already
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize