Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
The power of my boobs compel you
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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