and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
