I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
