I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize