It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize