Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
