When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
