Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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