I showed him my bush... on skype.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
