Sry I called you an 8
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
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