i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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