1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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