I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
