ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
