respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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