i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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