how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Randomize
