My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I see more hoeing in ur future
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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