Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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