Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
