Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
