so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I'm sobbing to NWA
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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