Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
