yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
