You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
