Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
