it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize