She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
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