wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I have tasted many bathrooms
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
