That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
