is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
