A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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