I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
