I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
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