he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
