Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
