We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
