We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
i think im in europe. pls send help
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
