I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
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