just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
