So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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