We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
