goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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