do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
