In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
