He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
