A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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