Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
